Five Hundred Words a Day

The truth comes crashing in uninvited and puts it's muddy boots up on the kitchen table to stare you in the face one day and you are forced to realize - that's me, none other. I'm the only one getting in my own way, every day. I so desperately want to stop myself from being happy and achieving my dreams and goals. Why? What set me on the course to be so hell bent on my own downfall and stasis. How did I convince myself I actually am the one sad cis white boy with nothing of value to say to anyone? I would laugh in earnest when I saw memes about the desire to obtain the confidence of a mediocre cis white male as though being magically imbued with some ability by my status and presentation wasn't a hard truth I had to face. But the stark reality is I do have an advantage in life - or I did if I haven't totally squandered it by now. But now I take on this phrase as a personal mantra. I will reclaim the sense of confidence and self assurance that is granted to me by ...

It's cold in the apartment in the lonely morning but I can't let that stop me from getting up early to put words on the page. My only desire in life anymore is to break through the wall and to start playing around in its wreckage. Watch the lettered blocks fall and scatter from a great height and then I can spend my mornings rearranging them as I like to. Here are a list of things I would really like to write about: The adventures of two goofy young cats, one tiger-black and the other honey-white. The tiger is brave, adventurous and outdoorsy, the honey-white is shy, creative and extremely talkative. A tank is burning somewhere in the line of vehicles being pulled through the deep woods by a long train. It is mid-day in the summer and there is no chance of rain. It is unlikely the fire will be discovered before the train reaches its destination and by then it will be far too late. A young man is accused of a crime publicly and accepts blame for it, allowing it to derail...